The Quickest Way To Lose 10 Pounds

Ladies and gentlemen, before starting this weight loss program, please make sure that your will is up to date and that your affairs are in order. The quickest way to lose 10 pounds is not for the feint of heart.

The results will mean certain death, but rest assured, the pounds will be lost.

Step 1 – Grab a writing instrument and a piece of paper. Draw anything. A beautiful tree, a bird in flight or even a picture of someone’s ass. The picture is not important.

Step 2 – At the bottom of the picture, write the name Mohammad.

See how easy that was? You have started the ball rolling for some quick weight loss.

The human head weighs in at about 10 pounds. The brain weighs about 3 and a combination of skull, teeth, eyes, facial muscles and skin make up the other 7 pounds.

The human head weighs about 10 pounds.

Prepare to lose it all in one swoosh.

It doesn’t matter what country you live in. This weight loss program works everywhere. There’s no need for special food or exercise. Just draw a picture. It really couldn’t be easier.

Free speech and democracy in your country? It doesn’t matter. Those in charge of the “keeping track of Mohammad pictures” will find you…… and when they do. A little choppity chop and a hackety hack and before you even know it, you’re ten pounds lighter.

When hearing about this method to lose weight, Debbie from Omaha had this to say.

“The system looks quick and easy, but I can’t see enjoying the weight loss on account of the fact that I’d be fucking dead.”

Good point Debbie, good point.

This is not a weight loss program for everyone, although the creators of the program like to think that it is. I must have missed that election where we voted for this supreme world group that controls the actions of everyone.

I really don’t recall when they got elected, but then again, I drink a lot, so who knows? I can only assume that the right to draw a picture was a hotly debated election issue. I know that if I was sober enough to vote I would have voted for drawing.

I don’t need to lose any weight right now. But if I ever need to lose 10 pounds quickly, I know what to do.

Note to Debbie from Omaha: All weight loss programs have their pros and cons.There is always cause and effect. No pain no gain, baby. Debbie, I hope that you find a system that’s right for you. In the meantime, you sound a little negative. Have you tried meditation and affirmations.

Here’s a beauty that I like to use every morning. Enjoy.

Affirmations for real people.

Happy weight loss people, and may the fictional fairy in the sky take a liking to you.

Please feel free to leave comments and suggestions below.

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